Passover. It's the first full day. I've already lost interest in matzoh. In fact, I never had any interest in it. I know. I should love matzoh brie, the eggy breakfast equivalent of french toast. But I don't. And matzoh as well as all its cousins-anything made from matzoh or matzoh meal-just lays there, in my stomach, turning to lead. Not a good thing.
So I'm over it. I'll stick to potatoes for the rest of the holiday. A few years ago, during the Atkins craze, I thought that Passover was a holiday made in heaven for those on the Atkins Diet. Avoiding carbs like pasta, bread and rice is what it's all about. In fact, I figured that Passover would be the perfect time for me to try the diet. I think I lasted a few hours before a craving for starchy foods set in. According to the gurus of anti carbs, that just means that it's the right diet for me. If I'm 'craving' carbs then I certainly shouldn't be eating them. Whatever.
I ate the obligatory matzoh at the Seder last night and will do the same tonight. Then this house is a matzoh free zone for the duration. I sent the one and only box I bought with my husband. He'll display it proudly in the kitchen at work. He'll offer work mates a taste. They'll politely say "it's not that bad". Not that bad. Is that the same as "it really sucks but I don't want to insult you"?
So what about calories? One whole board of matzoh has about 110-130 calories, depending on whether it's plain or egg or whole wheat. It still tastes like cardboard. And cardboard shouldn't have calories.
I know. It's "the bread of affliction that our forefathers ate" and not out of preference but necessity. I understand the significance. I just cannot eat it.